Habits - freeing or limiting?

At the beginning of the year, the usual articles about New Year's resolutions rolled out in the media. Yawn.

These were followed by the usual blither on making your resolution into a habit. Same, same.

I didn't make any resolutions. But I did think about habits.

A quote from William James (Habit, 1887)¹ prompted this exploration (my emphasis added): 

"We must make automatic and habitual, as early as possible, as many useful actions as we can, and guard against the growing into ways that are likely to be disadvantageous to us, as we should guard against the plague. The more of the details of our daily life we can hand over to the effortless custody of automatism, the more our higher powers of mind will be set free for their own proper work.

There is no more miserable human being than one in whom nothing is habitual but indecision, and for whom the lighting of every cigar, the drinking of every cup, the time of rising and going to bed every day, and the beginning of every bit of work, are the subjects of express volitional deliberations." 

Really?! Habits are freeing 'our higher powers of the mind'? Can habits also be limiting? And William, how do we distinguish the 'useful actions' from those 'likely to be disadvantageous'? And are 'express volitional deliberations' so bad?

I don't have any fondness for my habits. I've probably never thought about them much. 

If I do, it's as useful for mundane and boring things that just have to be done. You clean your teeth or you wash your clothes; if you do them at a regular time in an habitual way - just before bed, or every Monday - it is less effort. But that's all.

When my children were young, I found establishing habits and routine were the only way to get through the enormous amount of work. Finding the energy to make decisions constantly - when to wash the towels, what to have for dinner, how to clean the kids' mess up, when the kids would go to bed, when I would go to bed - would have been impossible. There was no spare energy for these type of 'express volitional deliberations'. 

It might have been a practical for me, but we know that parental habits are fundamentally important for young children: children need routine for a sense of predictability and security. 

So, life was highly habitual. It suited us all. I didn't notice any freeing of the 'higher powers of the mind' though.

But it was obvious when things needed to change.

The stage in a young person's life when they pull away from their parents often starts with mocking or deriding their parents' daily habits and routines. 'My parents always eat at exactly 6.00 p.m.; they are so boring!' 'You'll find them in front of the TV every night, their lives are so dull.' I mocked my parents when I was a teen. My children mocked me.

Little did we each realise that these derided habits had been established for our sake.

When children push back against their parents' habits, it is a sign of growing up, of individuality and independence.

It's a sign the habits might no longer be as important.

So, do parents let go of these habits when their children have grown? Do adults periodically review and chose new personal habits when life circumstances change? (This applies to all adults; parenthood is just my personal example.)

Well I don't think so. What happens often is adults settle into an almost fully habitual life: a sign of growing old, growing rigid, growing intolerant.

Some habits might be useful at one time, but at another time 'likely to be disadvantageous'.

We all know the stereotype of the older person getting 'set in their ways', their existence a set of rigid habits.

Habits can become problematic, because they can become intransigencies and restrictions, with a person's energy spent fighting any variation. Then you become the difficult and cranky old woman who wants her tea made with milk in first as it's always (habitually) been, at exactly 10.30 a.m. because that's when it is (habitually) supposed to be. Difficult because her habits are so entrenched, she sees them as the only correct way to do things (not just personal preference), and cranky because she resents that others do not respect her habits ('Who phones at 10.30!? Don't they know that's teatime!?'). 

I think habits are useful until they are not. 

Habits can do the opposite of 'free' us.

I see people limited by their own habits: their day filled from waking to sleeping with an absence of 'express volitional deliberations'. Not to free the mind, but to curtain all information and experiences that might be novel or challenging. To feel in control and secure. (Granted, such curtailment might be advantageous if you are a person with autism, for example; then controlling intrusions into your day is 'freeing' from feeling overwhelmed by stimuli.)

Like small children, adults can cling to habits primarily for predictability and security.

Source: Quotefancy

 And in our culture, people who are highly habitual in order to feel secure, often then use any 'freed' time and energy for passive consumption. They appear as automatons of habitual action (eating, working, sleeping) and habitual distr-action (passive activities like TV watching, getting drunk every weekend, shopping). Nothing wrong with any of those actions and distr-actions per se, it just seems to me that habit and that passive consumption are the sum of some people's lives.

To me, it looks unsatisfying. It seems far from 'freeing'.

Ah, you say, that's just your perspective! How can you possibly know which habits are actually advantageous for another? 

Agreed. I think it varies for each habit, each person, each stage of one's life. 

I understand that, for some people, habits meet an important need (in that meaning of 'useful') - a sense of control - but is that also 'likely to be disadvantageous' if they do this through the keeping out new ideas, any challenges to choices, and always avoiding 'the higher powers of the mind.'  

My point is William James' dichotomy of 'useful' versus 'disadvantageous' habits is not simple or static. Only we can determine which of our habits are which. A sense of control over your life is desirable, but perhaps not if it comes at the expense of a satisfying and meaningful life.

Habits can become simply an impoverished way of controlling your world.  

How do we tell which habits are useful for us? Which were useful in the past, but are now related more to our fear of change and need for certainty and control? Is that okay or 'likely to be disadvantageous'? Do our habits actually prevent ideas and experiences that might make life richer? 

Source: Goal Habits

And further: habits might allow us energy for the 'higher powers of the mind', but we also need to have had opportunity and encouragement² to learn to use our minds. I don't mean 'highbrow' intellectualising; I mean imaginative, exploratory, personally satisfying creating and thinking. The 'powers of the mind' that give meaning to our lives. And through life, we also need opportunity to develop these powers: to continue to learn how to think, to examine our own ideas, assumptions and prejudices, and explore others' ideas about the rich complexity of the world. 

So, I've come up with alternative New Year's resolution for myself: some questions to exam my habits. Is this habit freeing my mind for other, more satisfying things? Or is it ensuring nothing intrudes on my tiny cocoon of control? Am I continue to learn how to use my 'higher powers of the mind'? 

With my proviso that habits need to be reviewed periodically, I can accept James' idea about habits freeing the powers of the higher mind.

I feel a bit fonder of my habits now, thinking of them as sources of freedom. But I MUST amend the opening quote:

William James: There is no more miserable human being than one in whom nothing is habitual but indecision … and for whom every decision is the subject of express volitional deliberations.

and equally:

Wordly Explorations: There is no more miserable human being than one in whom everything is habitual but indecision … and for whom every decision is disconnected from express volitional deliberations.

Maybe instead of making resolutions next year based on the annual social media blither, you too could ask yourself: are my habits freeing my mind for other more satisfying things? 

It could even become a habit.


Footnotes

1. William James, 1887, Habit treatise https://archive.org/details/habitjam00jameuoft); quote first seen in Brain Pickings https://www.brainpickings.org/2012/09/25/william-james-on-habit/
2. Not everyone gets this opportunity or encouragement. Also, I have not commented on mental habits - those entrenched habits of thinking - negative thought patterns, social prejudices, etc - which can also be enormously limiting, rather than freeing of the 'higher powers of the mind'. If we have rigid habits of mind, it is unlikely that habits of behaviour free us up for anything. 

Images, used under Creative Commons Licences

• Cover of Habit treatise at https://archive.org/details/habitjam00jameuoft [Public domain]
• Tooth brushing, twice a day! Stuart Berry https://www.flickr.com/photos/stuartberry/4780276995 [CC BY-ND]
• A cup of tea at 10.30 sharp. Carol https://www.flickr.com/photos/71256895@N00/8676106650/ [CC BY-SA-NC]
• William James quote 1: on wallpaper by Daniel Leone at https://quotefancy.com/quote/934450/William-James-We-are-mere-bundles-of-habits [published under terms of use]
• William James quote 2: https://goalhabits.files.wordpress.com/2017/04/goalhabits_170427.jpg  [published under terms of use]